May 30, 2013

Shazzer & Grubby: What the Regime Insiders Really Think of the Daft Constifusion

Darling Grubby,

As you know I have been worried lately about the longevity of the Glorious Leader’s Rule and also the commitment of many of the regime insiders. Using hidden cameras and microphones I have managed to put together a video of what the current view is amongst the regime insiders. 

By the way did I tell you I had hidden cameras in the back of my 4x4. Don’t worry I have a reputation for going with younger Fijian men and I don’t want it ruined by releasing our sex tape.

Click on the nose of Mr Sincerity below and you will get a revealing look at what our friends really think about the Daft Constifusion. I tell you with friends like these Frankly Bananas does not need enemies. Even the President, NellieTheCow, says we should not be ruled by the unelected.

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I am feeling really pleased with myself at the moment. I organized a vote buying exercise for the Glorious Leader, but we spent money that was not ours.  Pretty Cool Hey! Actually that is not so unusual as Bananas only spends other people’s money, the taxpayers. 

More than 380 veteran sugar cane farmers received the first ever pension payout in FIji's history. The pension is provided through the Rarawai Penang Cane Producers Association and paid through the Fair Trade initiative.

Got go, I need to get ready because my young driver is coming round to help me test the new hidden camera in my bedroom. 

Hugs and Kisses


This is to inform the public that this letter is a piece of fiction. However, some of the people and events mentioned are real.

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